Status

Recent Statuses

1 day ago
Current I keep all my past RPs in archived subscriptions. I like having an overview of all I've done on the site.
6 likes
3 days ago
you can't just delete and repost so you make it look like I'm talking nonsense, that's illegal
7 likes
3 days ago
I think you just answered your own question
1 like
10 days ago
just means you're bad
2 likes
10 days ago
I didn't know todd howard was a filthy fucking weeb
2 likes

Bio

The day that Moss was hanged, eight others were cut down,
And when the graves had all been dug, the queen rode out of town.

(I have an old/outdated 1x1 check if you want to know what kind of person I am.)

Most Recent Posts

You've seen me on this thread. I'm keeping an eye on it, but I'm not making any promises of actually attempting to join.


"It's cold today too, huh...?"

Rui clutched her scarf a little as she walked down the streets, her bag in the other hand. Her home was close enough to not have to take the train, but it was still a few minutes worth of walking. Not that she wanted to rush it; if anything, Rui was walking slower so she could avoid it for as long as possible. She paused at the corner of one of the many walkways she passes through daily. "Maybe I'll go this way, just for today..." Rui told herself, taking a slight detour from the usual. She felt the road less travelled more familiar than her daily routine. And, looking down another street, she knew why. She went off-course again, stepping foward to a location she hadn't visited in a while.

"..."

Contemplative and silent stood Rui in front of the entrance to a playground, a public pen for young children. Nobody comes here much anymore, but Rui's lived in this town long as she can remember. She and Sora used to come here so much. She was the older of the two, yet could never keep up with his energy. He was so much better at the climber, and still bars... Rui often just sat on the swings and watched. Her glasses were a little foggy, but she wasn't looking much at the location as it is. Rui was caught up in her own mind, smiling softly at the warm memories as she tightened the grip on her scarf just a little more.

"Is this place special to you?"

Rui jumped ever so slightly as the unfamiliar voice next to her snapped the girl out of her trance. She turned her head, seeing a masked boy having suddenly come stood next to her. He wasn't looking at Rui, keeping his gaze turned at much the same location she had been staring at. "Um... I guess so. Just a little," she answered him. A brief pause, then she posed a question of her own: "What about you?"

He still didn't turn to look at Rui. In fact, the boy barely moved a muscle save for raising his chin up a little. "Me, huh...? No, not really. Or if it was, I can't remember." he said. Rui felt awkward. She didn't know this person and he hadn't given her a name either. She'd ask, but that mask unnerved her. He was a weird person, but she couldn't just run away either. After a bit, he finally turned his head to Rui. She could just barely make out his emerald eyes beneath the holes. "My apologies for disturbing you. Something about you... no, nevermind. Memories are precious. Whatever you were thinking of... keep it close to your heart. You should hold onto your past, no matter what."

After his cryptic (and weird!) speech the boy turned away from Rui and walked off. She had questions; a lot of them, even, but didn't have much heart to press them. Rui looked back at the playground. "...I'd never forget. Even if you hadn't told me that," she muttered to herself, irritation at the idea welling up inside of her. She didn't want to forget.
"I'm back, mom!" Rui shouted into the entryway of her house as she immediately began to take off her shoes.

"Welcome back, Rui. Dinner is almost ready." she heard coming from the kitchen. Rui stepped down the hall, towards that place. The girl stared at her mother's back as she stirred the pot. It smelled like Curry.

"Um... what about Sora, mom? He's not home yet," Rui asked timidly. His shoes weren't there.

"That boy always comes home late. He can reheat his dinner later," she curtly told her.

"I see... I'll be in my room," Rui said, darting off to drop her bag and throw herself onto the bed. She felt so bothered. So bothered! Rui shot a glance down to her stuff on the floor and reached out to fumble for her phone. She still had that texting window open to her brother. Rui turned around on her bed, laying now with her back against the sheets. She began to type another text, and this time, actually sent it when she was done.

"Are you far from home? Mom's almost done with dinner. She didn't wait to hear from us."
It’s a little tangentially-related but I’ll mention interiority as well: that changes for me depending on what I’m writing, though from what I’ve seen on RPG most tend to include it even in collabs which can be somewhat omniescent in feel in an interesting way that seems a little peculiar to RP. It’s not omniscient but rather limited and shifting.


God I hate collabs

I try to actively avoid any kind of interior monologue and try to only ever use the surface-level actions of what my characters are doing, including facial expressions, because I know the other person is going to toss in an "I thought" somewhere in there and being inside of the headspace of two people feels so wrong to read.

I much prefer solo posting when I have full control over the narrative flow, and at least any mistakes or oddities are going to be entirely on my shoulders and not partially the fault of somebody else.

That little rant aside, personally I always stick to third person past with a tiny sliver of introspection when it comes to the main meat of my posts. That's the most natural, least intrusive way to have others be able to pick up what I'm putting down.

I've also tried to explain how I tend to use first and second person in separate 'chunks' of my writing, especially recently, but I'm finding my explanations often come up short. I'll just give you this, this and this example and call it a day. The first was an attempt at a sort of dream sequence, the second was me trying to find a good way to "reply" to the GM's original prompt for a dream sequence everyone had (leaving out the parts of his post and only writing out Cyll's replies). The third was a prompt I'd written for both me and Charak to help get a feel for what it's like inside of a sort of parallel dimensional space which both our characters had a recurring dream of, which helped inform the mood for the first post. The stuff inside of IC posts is always sectioned off so I make clear what is and isn't part of the "main" narrative through line, happening before or after certain events and clearly being its own thing. Stuff like the third is what you could call an example of "GMing" though it being a 1x1 does mess with that idea a little.

Basically, while I find it hard to explain why I switch tenses, it's usually because I feel my first or second perspective writing is a lot better at conveying a "raw emotion" to the reader compared to my third.
I see that smile, day after day.
It's always there to greet me... no matter how hard it gets, you always keep up that smile.
But I know better, that you're just trying to hide how much it hurts.
Every day.
That's why, I...

The halls of school were filled with the one joy students experienced at the end of their long days; the sound of the bell signalling the end of classes. Seats were shuffled, chatter erupted, people dashed for the gate and from next to Rui, a female student spoke up.

"Kadomori-san?" she addressed her, with the Rui turning her head to look at her classmate. She'd wanted to go through her notes again before leaving, but that seemed out of the question at this point.

"Ah... Shio-san," Rui replied rather neutrally. "Is something the matter?"

"Yes, I mean no, uh... well, me and some friends wanted to go to Karaoke today. I never see you hang out with anyone, so I thought maybe you might want to come with us," Shio told her.

"Ahaha... I guess that's true," she awkwardly agreed. However, Rui couldn't accept her classmate's offer. After all...

"Ah, so you'll come? You could invite your brother, too!"

...it was always the same story. It was never actually about Rui at all. "No, I'm sorry... I actually have to go straight home today," she excused herself. Obviously, Shio was dejected. The girl tried in vain to convince Rui to come anyway. Her every attempt was met with polite refusal. After being alone again, Rui left her classroom behind, then started to make her way to the exit. Her attention was caught, briefly, by an open classroom on the way. She peeked through the open door, spotting a few students crowded around a desk. Two of those students were sitting down, seated across one another, as the both of them seemed to be playing some kind of game. Cards were scattered all across a mat that had been laid out on the desk. 'They seem to be having fun...' Rui thought to herself, briefly, before moving on.

Rui switched her shoes at the lockers, as usual, but paused once she'd closed the compartment again. "Sora, huh...?" she muttered to herself, pulling her phone out of her bag. She began to type something. "You don't have club activities today, right? Do you want to walk home together? I'll wait at the gate."

But then she deleted it again. Rui didn't have the time to be thinking about these things and Sora had plenty of friends to hang out with. She shouldn't force him to go home with her when he still had the entire rest of his day to spend.

'We're not kids anymore. I should give him some space.' is how Rui justified it to herself. She probably looked weird standing in front of her compartment like that, she figured, so Rui spun around and started making headway toward the school's gate again. She'd be fine on her own. Besides, if she didn't go home straight away, she was sure her parents would... well, it didn't matter.
Other characters


角森 るい
(Kadomori Rui)

Age:
17


(source)
(Extra Space if needed)


Nexus is a popular trading card game trending with young adults. The story is set in Modern Day Japan, where the game finds a lot of success. You can find card sellers in game shops around the country alongside plenty of local tournaments to attend. While it is a completely normal game for the average person, an unlucky few are witness to a more mystical and dangerous "game" played using Nexus as its vessel.

Memory Coins & the Commander Game:
One gets chosen as a Commander by receiving an Avatar card with an alive Avatar. The Avatar can move around freely inside of their own card, but only Commanders can see or hear Avatars that are like this.

Alongside your Avatar, you get two coins out of seven, with each coin representing one's memories.

If you win all seven coins, you get rewarded with the possibility of making a wish that the Avatar approves and having it come true. If you lose a coin, you forget one of your memories. If you want your memories back, the only option is to continue winning.

However, if one loses after having already lost all seven coins, by losing one coin for each loss and gaining one coin for each win, there are three consequences:

- You lose a big part of your memories. Only the very basics remain.
- Your wish won't come true.
- You lose your desires, motivations and your drive, leading to a lack of feeling anything at all.


I can't really answer the question of "how are you online vs. real life" with any one, precise, clear answer. Not because I lack the ability to do introspection, (although now that I mention it...) but rather because who "I" am is entirely dependant on the person that perceives me.

Everyone has their own biases and perception of the people around them and construct identities of people inside of their head- whether conscious or subconscious. If you ask what kind of a person I am to my friends, I wouldn't doubt you'd get a varied array of answers. There's probably a number traits that could and would overlap within the individual answers, but I don't think you'd get one particular trait that everyone thinks of on their own.

This extends to me, personally, too. I can do a dissection of my own character all I like, but that isn't going to stop it from being coloured by my own biases about myself- whether positive or negative. The answers I give now would also, most likely, not even be the same answers I'd give three years from this point.

The only thing I can say with certainty is that I am different IRL to online- but I wouldn't be able to tell you in exactly what way that is. I like to have a sense of humor in both personas, but my humor is different. I'm shy on both ends, but it manifests in another way.

That isn't even to mention that I don't just differ IRL to online- I differ in IRL to IRL and Online to Online too. I just don't act the same way around my family as I do my friends or my fellow university students. I don't have multiple personalities; there's only one Ammokkx, but the personality that is there is ever-changing based on the individual situations I find myself in. I'm mean to people, but I'm not mean to everyone. I'm also nice to people, but I'm not nice to everyone. I'm patient with some, not with others. I don't have a consistent personality, despite being a consistent person.

This post doesn't really have a conclusion, or point to make. It's word vomit.
i sorta feel bad for the OP when people are freshly coming in to dunk on him when his mind's already changed

but at the same time

with that title, what could you even expect to happen
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